Good Day, Bad Day
It's Sunday night and the weekend is nearly over. If I could have every day like it was yesterday - I'd have a dozen kids and quit my job! Seriously, both kids were such good boys! A few minor scraps here and there, but nothing that would compare to some of the days we've had lately. Saturday started out with going into my mom's house. We had a web cam with Rylan's former foster mother in Guatemala! It was great to see her, and they loved seeing Rylan. We were on for about an hour and this time the call ended in tears for them, not me. When Rylan was still in Guatemala, it was me who had a hard time holding them back. I feel for them, I really do. I know they poured a lot of love and hard work in our little guy, and I will always be grateful! After the call we had some lunch and I decided to put Rylan down for a nap there. My dad was staying home, so make the two people taking naps! John was working, so it was my mom, Cameron and I. We went to La Crosse, WI and I dropped my mom off at the mall. I surprised Cameron with a Railroad Show that was going on! We've been to it every year, and he loves it so much. It so SO hot! We spent a couple hours there touring a train and walking through the swap show. We then went back to get my mom, stopped at Toys-R-Us for a small treat, then Wendy's to eat. Cameron couldn't have been better! No complaining, no sassing, no fighting, he ate great, and fell asleep on the way home. In fact we got back around 5:30pm to get Rylan, and Cameron never got up! We got home and he went right to bed and slept until 6am this morning. Rylan got some nice playtime in (uninterupted by his big brother).... it really was such a relaxing time. Today. Well, that is another story. Both kids were up at 6am and were hell on wheels! I'm not kidding. If it could be fought over, they did it. Hitting, hollaring, pushing, attempts at biting.... you name it! It was hot again, so we did stay inside most of the day. Rylan had a short nap, which didn't help the situation either. I'm trying my hardest to understand how to help these two kids meet in the middle. Rylan, well he can get pushy and can irritate Cameron. I understand some of Cameron's anger. But mostly, it's Cameron. He has zero patience. I know, at 5yrs old what can we expect? I have to say, I expect more than this though. I'm trying really hard to stay consistent with time outs and taking toys away. I'm trying to jump in before a fight escalates. I'm trying to understand how much of an adjustment this really is for not just us, but Cameron. Most of all, I'm trying NOT to loose my cool. Cameron's behavior is following through to daycare. My daycare mom is my cousin and she lives block from where I work, and where my mom lives. It can't get much better for us really. But I think of combination of things are happening. First, all this. It's overwhelming for Cameron, it really is. Then at daycare most days he's the only boy his age. The rest of the kids are either 2yrs old or younger. Then girls 5-9 years old. He's sort of stuck in the middle with nothing to do but find trouble. We are thinking of switching him to a daycare center for the rest of the summer (5-6 weeks). Maybe that will offer more kids his age, more of a structured day, and time away from Rylan. It may help him starting kindergarten this September too? My fear is that it would make it worse. I seriously want to cry when thinking about it. It breaks my heart to see him struggle because I know he is a GREAT kid! I know what he is capable of. I only hope my choices help him, not hurt him. I can't do nothing and hope it gets better because I have a daycare mom that will be driven to the nut house! It's bothering me so bad that I worry about it all the time, and most importantly, I need to help Cameron. I just don't know how. Urgggg.... I knew we'd have some adjustments period. I just hope and pray that we start getting more good days. That we can find the right balance. Never in my life would I have dreamed parenting would be filled with so many ups and downs. You love these little beings so much it hurts! You want them to do better, and be better than you were. You want so much for them. I love my boys and am very lucky to have them. We just need to find the right way to get over the speed bumps! I have feeling after we pass this one, there's going to be many, many more to come!










